There’s now another person I want to meet in heaven some day. I understand his story and have much in common with him.
The guy made it to the Hall of Faith (Hebrews 11), even though his weakness was not totally trusting God (hmmm…sounds familiar). It’s Gideon. God had so much patience with Gideon’s need for confirmation and assurance before he went into battle. He needed it over and over.
Don’t we all? I do.
I’ve been especially feeling the need for assurance over the past couple of weeks…or maybe a lot longer. This beginning of a new venture is getting closer and closer and I’m getting more nervous and more nervous! I keep asking myself, “Should I really be doing this? Why am I making a bigger deal about it in my mind than it probably really is? I’m just going to listen to some great speakers and meet a few people…all by myself. Why do I feel anxious? Why do I have this feeling of anticipation (and yes, some excitement!) ?” My heart starts beating quick whenever I think about it. Why? What will happen after next week?
I just read that we learn through Gideon’s story that “God may ask us to take risks on the way to assurance. Going into the enemy camp is dangerous (thus the advice to take Purah with him to spy on the Midianites). In the same way, we may find that we lack assurance of God’s presence with us because we never do anything bold”.
I’ve decided to be bold and take risks.
I have to be desperately dependent on only HIM…not my expectations, not my needs, not my selfish wishes…in order to be bold and take risks….plus there are many loved ones in my life who are nudging me, praying for me and supporting me in this venture in order for it to happen.
So I have to be desperately dependent.
Tim Keller said when we read God’s and His people’s revelations in His Word and especially His promises, “we often find that the Holy Spirit comes and makes the promises both real and sweet to us.” (Rom. 8:16)
How sweet it is.
Thank-full to God for…
1001 – “God wanted to assure Gideon (and Beth) one more time and fill him with confidence and joy”. (over and over) - Tim Keller
1002- The sun rising through the fog this morning…seeing magnificent sun beams shining through the fog and red and orange leaves
1003 - Seeing a group of bluebirds frolicking and playing on the children’s playground on my morning walk.
1004 – going to the theater to see the kids production of “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat” with my daughter
1005 - my husband’s support (even technical) and love as he’s setting me off into the unknown…in a good way.